A very private statement
At SomeOne we are very good at keeping secrets. It’s crazy how much we know. But you’ll never know this. Why? Because we take the trust people give us seriously. No one likes a gossip.
Equally, we want to safeguard and preserve your privacy when you visit our site or communicate electronically with us.
We do update this Policy from time to time so please do review this Policy when required. But seriously, it’s not a regular thing, so don’t come dashing back tomorrow hoping for a terrific new read, it’s very, very unlikely to happen.
The information that we collect
As mentioned above, we gather information about your computer for our services & to provide statistical information regarding the use of our website.
The information does not identify you personally. At all. It is statistical data about visitors & their use of this site. This statistical data does not identify any personal details whatsoever. Seriously, we don’t know if you are blonde, brunette or fiery red. (Although we’d LOVE to know).
We’re gathering information about the use of our website by using a cookie file. Again, this is nothing new, everyone’s at it. Cookies are downloaded to your computer’s hard drive automatically, it’s amazing. They help us improve our website & the service that we provide to you. Essentially, these funny little files, that you will not notice, help make things better for you. We think of them as tiny binary angels that flit between this website & your computer making everything better. Like the tooth fairy.
All computers, have the ability to decline cookies. This can be done by activating a setting on your browser which enables you to decline the cookies. BUT! If you choose to decline cookies, you may be unable to access particular parts of our website & that would be a shame. But, ultimately, your choice. Do what you will.
Use of Your Information
Any information we collect & store directly relating to you is primarily collected when you email us. This data is used to enable us to provide our services to you. We may use this information for the following purposes:
Data that is provided to us is stored on secure servers, behind massive locked and bolted gates and a chap called Harold who, if your name is not on the list, will not let you in under any circumstances. Harold (or Hard Harold as he’s known) is very well connected too — if you know what we mean — So don’t worry, you are safe hands.
Sad, but true — the transmission of information via the internet is not completely secure — these screens have ears — therefore we cannot guarantee the security of data sent to us electronically. Even though we are really trustworthy, the internets are not. So, transmission of such data is therefore sent entirely at your own risk. Where we have given you (or where you have chosen) a password so that you can access certain parts of our site, you are responsible for keeping this password confidential. Like a pin number, or the address of that really sweet little place you don’t want ruined by all your friends going there all the time.
Third Party Links
You might find links to third party websites on our website! Exciting times, we know. Now… these websites should have their own privacy policies which you should check, some people are not as nice as we are. It’s exactly because we are nice and some people are not that we have to say that we do not accept any responsibility or liability for their policies whatsoever — why? We have no control over them. So if they are horrid in any way, it’s not our fault.
Access To Information
For your own knowledge, the really rather smart Data Protection Act 1998 ensures strict adherence to the 8 principles that underpin it. Data must:
and the General Data Protection Regulations (GDPR) gives you:
If this is applicable, bear in mind, that the information we have about you can be as dull as just your email address (after you emailed us and asked what typeface we use on the website). Now, we’re all busy, so we’d rather you didn’t swamp our inbox with stacks of demands for access to this stuff. But, should you wish to receive details that we hold about you relating to the above please contact us using the contact details below.
If you’ve read this far, seriously, congratulations. You are part of an elite, a rare few, a tiny group of people who have ventured to the metaphorical outer hebrides of legal statements. We hope you found it useful, illuminating even, and who knows, possibly mildly amusing. Not often you can say any of that about legal copy. Now if you don’t mind, we’ve got to get back to doing what we do best — creating better brands.
This document was last updated on May 1, 2018.